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It is all black and grey!

Warning - Contains explicit and uncensored content from the mind of a depressed woman. If you feel the need to judge or feel the need to give me unsolicited advice, you can "FUCK OFF"! 

"Writing is therapeutic. It is like painting with words and your thoughts are the colors"                                                                                                         - Krithi It is all black and grey!
Would someone notice if I went missing?
NOT REALLY!!! NOT FOR DAYS!! MAYBE EVEN WEEKS!!

Would someone miss me if I disappeared?
Dad

Would anyone shed tears if I ceased to exist?
Dad for sure! Maybe few others! And few others for a few seconds. But everyone will move on in a jiffy. 

Is it my curiosity that makes me wonder?
Maybe!

Or is it the impending sense of doom triggered by low moods?
If I am being honest, yes!

I force myself to get out of bed, to dress and to go to work. No one knows that most days, I sit on my sofa for hours doing nothing but stare outside the windo…
Recent posts

My Dad, The Unsung Hero!

I started writing this 3 years ago when my Daddy was recovering from his open heart surgery. It has been an uphill battle ever since. More on Parkinson's and living with it in the upcoming posts. I have seen this man go through hell and more in the past 30 years. I have always been angry on the world for not letting him have the happiness and peace he deserves. This is an Ode to the Best Dad in the world! This one post would never suffice. He deserves an epic but I will settle for couple of more posts since I am only dabbling my hand at writing!
"Some Super Heroes don't wear capes! They are Called Dad!"
Like every girl, my dad is my first hero. As a child, I always felt my dad was invincible and with him around, no harm could touch me. He knew answers to every question, helped me lift heavy things and when I fell down, he convinced me that nothing happened and pain is nothing. He was the wittiest, bravest and the strongest super hero I had ever seen in person. Never di…

What's in your search history?

I have always been a very curious person. My curiosity has kept me up many nights and I let my mind wander into new realms, into the past, into the space and into some insane territory. If you want to know a person better, you can take a sneak peek at their search history, Netflix and youtube suggestions. Here is a little insight about Krithi. Fair warning, some of the contents are highly disturbing and intriguing. The list of the ten things I searched(Read/watched) for in recent times -

1. World war 2
2. World war 1

Now, let me explain. I have been crazy obsessed about the world war ever since I watched the Netflix series, "World War 2 in Color" (Hyperlinked it, just in case). This led me to research things like Fascism, Japan's invasion of China, Hitler's Nazi Party and it is extremism, trinity - "Mussolini, Stalin & Hitler" and their deeds

Then once I got over WW2, I wanted to know what led to world war-1 which led me to search for "Sarajevo &am…

The Big THREE-OOOOOOOO!

Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of thirty.
- Robert Frost.


The Big 30 - the reason why I am writing. When I was younger, if you had asked me the question, if I thought I will be single when I hit my thirties I might have been naive and said, “I don’t think so!!!!!!!!” (Yes, the many exclamation marks!!!!!!!!!)
On the road to finding a Prince Charming, I found myself. As cheesy as it sounds, I think I learned to love myself without any ridiculous standards or expectations I impose on myself. I was chided once by someone,
“Krithi might probably even fall for someone with the placard LOVE !”
Breaking news people, the same girl who wrote cheesy love stories and believed in unconditional love is now a practical cynic and takes baby steps with caution. Thanks to every guy I met on the road with commitment issues especially towards the last leg of my journey.
I woke up on the day of my 30th birthday feeling light as a feather. Not a jot of emotion for the c…

Defeated

I bled the words from my heart onto the paper for the sorrow in my soul flooded, in the silence of the night.

All I had for company are the thousand droplets I shed in agony, fear and the void from the darkness that devours my soul!

With one swift flick,
Within a blink of an eye,
I could end it.

But cowardice is what that stops me!
Hence I put on the mask and pretend to be okay!
After all, everything I love only wants to destroy me!
And I let it...